Dear Bunglehorn,

You may have heard recently of female sharks in captivity that reproduced asexually. The idea isn’t a secret in science. Parthenogenesis (Greek translated literally is virgin creation) is seen in many species of plants, birds and amphibians where reproduction occurs without male fertilization. This story is gaining traction because it hasn’t been observed in sharks until recently.

Well, the blogosphere is already making holy connections to the Immaculate Conception. I know, I know, we can easily rationalize parthenogenesis as only being observed in the lower rungs of flora and fauna, never among mammals. And we can say it happens more frequently than we realize, we’re simply more apt to observe the phenomenon with modern science and technology. That is all fine and well.

However, I am concerned about certain intellectuals, your patient included, who easily grasp the limits of natural sciences. Scientists can only study what they observe. They cannot disprove what they cannot observe. This understanding leads to dreamers. It’s far too difficult to compete with the child-like state of wonderment, especially from an intellectual whose scientific observations strengthen his faith. Isn’t the Theory of Evolution widely accepted, even with missing links?

It’s best if we shred the mere possibility that the Enemy entered the world through a virgin vessel. Many accept this on sheer faith, and they may be beyond our grasp, but we can reach the intellectual through his nagging need for proof. These latest reports do not provide proof, but they could cause his mind to conceive the possibility, no pun intended. Once he embarks on that path, and considers the Enemy’s omnipotence (anything is possible), it’s not so difficult to imagine that he could manifest himself through the mystery of an Immaculate Conception. The idea, coupled with proof in Sacred Scripture, is a sliding slope to reverence for the Blessed Virgin Mary, as the Enemy so commanded.

So by all means, distract your patient if you catch the slightest glimpse of hope. Use hunger, fatigue, cynicism, lust, whatever tools you have at your disposal.

Warmest Regards,
Wigglebrick

The Vault

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